The World's Shortest Marriage

I was married for about five minutes to a guy disguised as the Man of my Dreams. However, Dear Husband had a Secret Life. Watch in horror as I deal with the fallout of the World's Shortest Marriage.

Monday, April 23, 2007

A Baby is Born

Congratulate me - I'm the proud parent of a baby tomato.

I literally shrieked with happiness when I saw the tiny green baby, my first, hidden between the leaves of my bushy tomato plants.

I know, you don't have to be the jolly green giant to grow tomatoes. Anyone can do it. I've seen them grow on their own next to trash cans.

But this is my first-ever home-grown produce. And although planting a garden is by definition an act of faith, I didn't really believe that anything would grow there. And once the plants began to grow, I didn't believe they would bear any fruit.

In other words, I'm a little short on faith these days.

But here it is - my first tomato. Sometimes even when I have no faith, I get surprised - by nature, by spring, by the eternal power of renewal.

I can't wait until his brother Basil grows up - I'm going to cradle them in my arms, nestle them in my basket, and scramble them with some eggs. Yum.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Lost

One of my friends hit it right on the head the other day.

'Still feeling lost, sweetie?' he asked.

I do feel as if I've lost my way. More accurately, I'm having a hard time remembering what the way even looks like.

Actually, I'm having a hard time figuring out whether I'm depressed, wallowing in self-pity, or just experiencing some delayed grieving. I did sort of bypass mourning the end of my marriage to Dear Husband, although I tried hard to experience the emotions as they came my way.

It's time to find a new way, and I don't even know where to start. I'm stuck in a rut so deep that I can't even see the sky.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Seven Years of Bad Luck

I just took a peek at my credit report, and I am not pleased.

Although the collection agency that was pursuing Dear Husband's delinquent hospital bill promised to remove the ding from my credit report once the bill was paid off, that was apparently a lie they told just to get me off the phone - a strategy they may have learned from DH.

When I spoke to them today, they told me I should have paid the bill myself in January if I wanted to avoid a negative credit report. I'm especially furious because three months ago I was telling myself the same thing, but decided not to out of spite. And because I didn't have the money. And because I wasn't going to let him get off the hook that easily.

So now DH's visit to the emergency room is going to haunt my credit report until 2013. I'm learning this on the same day that I'm writing a check for a tax bill that almost made my eyes roll permanently back into my head. Apparently having your taxes withheld as married all year and then filing as single isn't the best tax strategy.

All of this comes as I was contemplating the most unexpected development ever - my friend B offered to look into the possibility forming a partnership to buy a duplex or triplex here in LA.

I'm not going to give up, but today my financial outlook and the possibility of homeownership are both looking pretty grim. Whenever I think that DH has taken everything from me that there is to take, another dream sprouts wings and flies away. Thanks, buddy. Thanks for everything.